Forbidden - A Fifty Words Story

in #fiftywords3 years ago (edited)


"We don't give our Charles any sweetstuff; all of that sugar is poison to his body" said Mrs O'Brien with visible pride.

The other Mammys nodded uncomfortably.

Meanwhile, it was lunchtime at the boys school. A van stopped. Chocolate was offered through the window. Only Charles accepted.

He was taken.

I've seen some other fifty worders give some background to their stories in recent weeks, so I'll give a little background here for this week's story.

The central theme here is that sometimes we can be overly strict with our kids and forbid certain things or behaviours and often this can backfire and make the child really want the forbidden thing or behave even worse.

In my story the children at the school gate stayed clear of the van, paying heed to advise they had no doubt heard from parents and school teachers alike about strangers, vans and the promise of sweets. All except Charles; he couldn't withstand the urge to have a little taste of the forbidden chocolate, which was not so allusive to the other children. This forbidden fruit ended up causing great harm instead of doing anything positive, as he is tragically kidnapped.

Us modern parents strive for perfection for our children, but maybe what we should do; is cut them a bit more slack and let them be children. Like everything, balance is paramount, you don't want to spoil them either, but come down somewhere in the middle ground.

And remember be practical! It's ok to forbid Heroin, but maybe not Hersey bars. It's ok to forbid guns, but maybe not gummy bears 😊

This was my entry into @jayna's #fiftywords contest. This is a great way to get back into writing, hone your writing skills or just try out writing. We are building a super supportive little community here now under the watchful eye of @jayna. I encourage you to give it a go and be sure to check out as many other stories as you can, leave a comment, upvote them if you like what you have read and support each other :o)

This week's prompt was "chocolate", see @jayna's page for full details.

The picture I used above is not my own and the source is here

Thanks for taking the time to read my little story.

Peace out.



A modern day Adam. I probably would have taken it too.

Yep, I'd be tempted too, but my Mum had it ingrained in my head to never take sweets of strangers, that I think I'd have just about withstood the temptation!! :o)

Ah, a story with a moral. I love it. Let that be a lesson to moms who keep the chocolate for themselves... er, I mean keep it out of the house completely. 😊

Nice work, @ablaze. I enjoyed reading the thoughts behind the story. And yes I believe we have an official trend.

ha ha ha, yes of course, def not keeping the chocolate for yourself... wipes chocolate from face with sleeve

This post has received a 7.69 % upvote from @boomerang.

Oh, so good!
I could almost hear the voice of the mother and feel the uneasiness of the others. We all know that in a world, where chocolate is always available parents can hardly pull that through. Outside the parents house there is no one who controls and the kids catches what it can to fulfill a desire which becomes even more desirable if it's strictly forbidden.
When the desire is bigger than the caution things happen one does not foresee.

I like how you describe middle ground through your examples.

Thanks a lot @erh.germany, appreciate your commentary and agree with what you say about things that are forbidden becoming more sought after... I guess parenting like many things in life requires balance and above all patience..

My kids would love this story. I won’t share it with them!!!

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Very good story, @ablaze. As a mother of two I can totally understand the morale behind it. There were times when I felt uncomfortable due to other mommies braging about the rules they put in place and their children schedule. At some point I even thought I totally lost control. The big surprise was that my son does not ask for money when I tell him to help with the chores (I guess he will not learn too fast the "money value"). And my daughter (she's only one and a half) refuses to let strange people to hug her or even touch her.
And they do eat my chocolate. 🙂