Freewrite by @mariannewest - Tuesday's Prompt - Not Smart

in #freewrite3 years ago (edited)

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Not Smart

If there has ever been a phrase

That I took to heart
It's the words that repeatedly
Found their way into my mind and for a season tore me apart

Years later so many years, so many tears

I still remember the phrase “Not Smart”

At best I must confess

I made some bad choices, went to dark places in my mind,
Had some un-incumbent associations
I was often late,
I judged when I should have reframed,
I got a little tipsy for a little too long,
I repeatedly carved out lives that were like singing out of key or playing the wrong song.
And because I failed to plan I planned to fail from the start and in all of these instances I admit I was not smart.
But none of it I took to heart I gave life another try, having somewhat of a clue this time of what not to do.


Yet It seems that in the company of certain ones

That I was never good enough
I became the joke in their conversations without end.

But what they did not know was

All they said could have lasted longer
Because all it did was make me stronger
And every time in every way when they knocked me down
It seems I got up and grew taller in my determination
To be much greater than that phrase that singes my heart
The epitaph at the end of all their verbal condemnations.... "Not Smart"

And the cruelty of the words

Like moron, simple, slow and dumb
Rolled off of me like water did on a duck’s back
I laughed along with the crowd
As I picked my face up off the grown
On the inside, I wore a frown
But I turned that bad boy upside down
And I smiled and held my head up for all to see.

Sometimes life can be bittersweet

And on occasion, we may be scrutinized and misunderstood
It’s a matter of opinion of what’s not smart so don’t take it to heart
But move through life knowing that you are smart as you need to be
And you’re better than good.

Sort:  

Deep and filled with the wisdom of experience.

Thank you beautiful Rose.

My sincere pleasure, my friend.

Posted using Partiko Android

What a beautiful piece @rensoul17, thank you for sharing with our #freewrite community. 👍

I love your poem @rensoul17 and your encouragement for others is perfect. : )

Resident cat here, finally back home and helping to deliver today's new prompt: https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-355-5-minute-freewrite-wednesday-prompt-well-being

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Ooh!!! I have been waiting for this. My mind is marinating on a quaint creation. Thank YOu @whatisnew!!

HaHa! I love your reply. My pleasure @rensoul and I am looking forward to your creation. : )

Ren,
I follow your work with great admiration, I think you know that. I miss many many posts from people I admire and many more from those undiscovered gems still hiding in steemit.
I have been less engaged lately. I must credit @wonderwop for leading me back to you. They nominated your piece as their favourite free write. I am a fan of your work, but this one is indeed stand out, as @wonderwop described.

It goes several layers deeper and unveils a truth and vulnerability, a relatable piece. Internal dialogue, built upon by words spoken by others and no doubt not even remembered by them, these words resonate and intensify and amplify, and can become our truth.
Drowning out the true self they can pull us under. But the beauty in your words describe a process where you no longer feel that undertow, you are not even treading water or swimming against the tide that once mapped out your flow for you, you have learnt that you can float. Float not upon the tide but above it. All the exhaustion you convey from years of ebb and flow can be heard, the tears shed unnoticed and unacknowledged in that ocean and it's currents. It took you to many places some willingly some by sheer force of the tide. Your travels have brought you to this day.
I wish you had not endured the difficulties, though your insights and the dimension and depth to which you draw from in your writing is enhanced by a life lived. I feel blessed to know you.
Once again we have benefited as readers due to your willingness to demonstrate the strength in risking vulnerability.

Thank you so much Sis, Your words mean a lot, thanks for reaching out. I am late but I will be responding to your email soon.

@wonderwop brought me here
And when I read, I understood the cheer
I like the tenacity, the pride, the resilience
People always think they are smarter because it comes from their perception, clueless that is only that... a perception
I can say this, because I am guilty of it too
But I too, have been on the receiving end of unspoken insults, and derogatory thoughts

I liked this very much :)

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