Setting Boundaries | Musings
I am disturbed today by how I usually end up at the butt end of rants.
I do not mind listening to people; rather, I quite enjoy hearing the thoughts of another person in general as it offers me interesting insights into human psychology.
Yet once in a while, the rants become excessive and I feel like an emotional dumping ground.
“I’m neither happy or sad but confused and indecisive” and “Idk what to do please help”, when I am offering no help whatsoever except by being a fleshly sponge, soaking up (what must be for you) an extremely cathartic release of negative energy.
My answers and replies are so inconsequential to the point that my polite signals that this has taken up too much of my time today go entirely unheeded and the rant continues on, like a herd of buffalos storming past.
I do realise I have to take 100% responsibility for whatever goes on in my life. Even if something unpleasant occurs to me, I am in full control of my reaction to said unpleasant incident.
So, in other words, I cannot really resent those who take me for an emotional dumping ground – for I must have set myself up in such a way that I am in a perfect place for them to spew their vomit.
Even if that did not actually happen, I have the choice right now to erect a fence around my energy and hang a sign on it that states “Sorry, not available today”.
Rather than harbour ill-will against the ranting person, I can just nicely decline to stay.
I can walk away, for a while, til my nerves are less frazzled and I am in a better space to manage both my emotions and the speaker’s.
And so, that is what I have just done.
Photo Credits: Kenny Luo, Unsplash