Dealing With the Loss of A Loved One: Can You Relate to These Phases?
The loss of someone you love can be a very difficult thing to try and deal with. The trauma of losing a loved one can be very overpowering, especially when you develop physchological obstacles that won't allow you to have peace of mind to accept the loss.
Here are the phases that you can go through when dealing with a loss of someone you love.
The term that specialist in the psychology field use when a person refuses to accept what happened is often called the "denial phase".
A good example would be acting if the loved one lost is just not around at the moment or refuse to believe what has happened to that person. A person in this phase might refuse to use the words "dead" or "gone" when referring to their loved one.
One way to overcome this phase is to be taken to the grave to visualize the finality of death, which may bring out the reality that one may be trying to elude.
Most importantly though, a person needs to be allowed whatever time they need to come to terms with the truth. Trying to force matters on a person can actually make the situation worse.
A sudden loss of someone you love can often lead to anger towards the situation and towards the fact that the future and life itself will never be the same. This type of anger can be directed towards just about anyone as it is hard to live life and just listen to what anyone has to say.
When the anger becomes directed as one's own self, this can often lead to depression. This is especially true when the anger is held inside. It is extremely important at this stage to open up and talk with someone.
It is important for family and friends to be sensitive to a person who is feeling like this. It is important for a person dealing with grief stricken anger to know that someone will always be there for them when they need to express their feelings. If they can identify anger in the person, they should try and help get the anger out. The anger should be released any way a person feels comfortable with, without causing harm to themselves or anyone else.
The next phase that can follow is one of the most common and and most harmful. The "depression phase" will give a person a feeling of hopelessness knowing a lost loved one will never be in their life again.
Letting go can often lead to be very depressing.
Overcoming depression will take some people longer than others. If a person grieving becomes unable to sleep, refuses any support, or has a loss of self-esteem or self-worth, it may be time to seek professional help.
It is common in this phase to find yourself constantly crying. There should be no reason to feel ashamed about doing this. Tears can often be healers. But it important to realize if this is going on for months and is effecting one's ability to function, help should be sought.
Going through all these phases will eventually bring to the mind the "acceptance phase". Even as you continue to miss and love the decease, new days and all the great memories made will help bring acceptance of the death.
This is when you realize you can, and will, go on with your life.
This is also when you can start remembering all the great memories you have and all the special times you were able to spend with that person.
Unfortunately, losing someone you love will be something that we will all have to face at one time or another.
I have lost my parents, and other people I love in my life and have dealt with all these phases at one time or another.
With all the loss I have faced in my life, I realize that talking with others can really help get you through your loss.
One thing for sure, having great memories can, and will never be taken away from you. It is remembering all the good times that keeps me positive and knowing that is how the people I lost would want me to be.
What do you think?
Have you experienced sudden loss in your life?
How have you handled it?
Feel free to leave a comment, even if you just need to vent!