Guilt changes a person
There is a young woman that I know who is emotionally shackled by her own guilt.
She has not committed some heinous act of violence nor has she stolen vast riches or destroyed priceless artifacts. I think many people who do those things feel no guilt or remorse. You see that everywhere in the news.
When she was young, she was funny, care-free and was quite the artist working with acrylics and clay. She moved from that to crochet, knitting, and even tanning animal hides. She was a trend setter even though she had no intention to be. She was involved in her church and because of her their bus ministry exploded. There were probably 20 kids that got on the bus at her stop every Wednesday night.
She is highly intelligent and school didn't appease her. Schools today are dumbed down so everyone can pass. She became bored and left home when she was 16. I think she was on the road for about 3 years hitching here and there with her dog.
Fast forward a few years.
This girl now lives in the foothills of some mountain chain. From what I hear, she's got a nice place with a creek and pasture land. She's got chickens and a herd of dogs. The one thing that she does not have is peace.
Her faith was quite strong at one point but after having gone on the road she has become neo-paganistic.
She thinks that capitalism is bad even though the property she lives on is totally supported by it.
She derides her parents for being racist even though they are a mixed couple and she herself does not have any minority friends.
She doesn't have much to do with her parents anymore.
I was talking to her dad a few weeks ago and he said that he had called her to tell her that there was a death in the family and that perhaps she should call her grandmother to check on her and offer a little emotional support. She said that she didn't know how to feel about that. She said that it would be awkward. She said that the family thought she was lost and a sinner and she couldn't deal with that.
As far as I know, she never called.
Her dad did tell me that he got a text from her a day or two later saying that she loved him very much. She just didn't know how to communicate with him anymore. The man is at a loss as to what he should do. Attempts to communicate in the past often escalated until he would walk off. Sometimes she would follow, continuing to harp on the matter. Sometimes she would try to reconcile later but put the onus on him for not accepting all her views as valid.
I do so wish that there was some way that I could intervene. To tell here that Jesus still loves her. To tell her that he can fix her brokenness. To tell her that he can give her the joy that she used to have.
Her dad has told me that their prayer has been that someone else may be sent to speak to her because she won't hear what they have to say. My hope is that one day the prayer is answered so they might reconcile and once again be a family.