The Power of Words in Parenting

in #nigeria4 years ago (edited)

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Parenting is a noble task, it is mainly through it that lives are moulded thus taking away the beast in every human being. Although, there are different avenues through which the sacred obligation of parenting is carried out, but my focus here is on the avenue of words which I believe is the most efficacious tool in the art of parenting.

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The christian holy book tells us that the power of life and death lies in the tongue. When we speak negatively, we pronounce death and vice versa. From my experience, most parents from this part of the world (Nigeria/Africa) tend to be careless in their usage of words towards their children. In our local parlance here, it is common to find parents especially mothers, using such words on their kids "tunda fire you" (let thunder strike you); "this pikin i no go beta for you" (this child, it shall not be well with you); "mumu pikin" (stupid child); "waka, your fada dere" (more like jabbing fingers on the kid while insulting the kid's father at the same time), etc.

The list is endless, time will fail me to mention all. The truth is that any word being used on a child plays two cardinal roles towards the child. Words affect the behaviour of a child, and also constitute the values a child imbibes. For instance, a child who repeatedly receives any of the above mentioned "bombs" from the parents, stand the risk of leading a lifestyle that is reflective of the "bombs". Growing up as a child precisely in my primary school days, I wasn't meeting up with my mates in terms of academic performance, and I must confess that my parent's reaction to this really worsened the matter as they most times referred to me as " iti boribo" (a dullard). But thank God they later had a change of orientation and did more to encourage me. Undoubtedly, the foregoing marked the beginning of a turn around in my academic fortune.
Similarly, usage of offensive language by children can safely be traced to the manner of words the atmosphere of their homes are characterized with, it is simply garbage in, garbage out. The law of sowing and reaping is one that cannot be thwarted. Whatsoever words parents sow in the upbringing of their children, same will they reap. A word is enough for the wise.
I appreciate your time in reading this article as I look forward to your contributions on how best to parent.

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Just to add to your submission @abenike, apart from parents watching their tongue in the upbringing of their children, they need to also watch the tongue of their friends and neighbours who have close relationships with their family.

Already you told us about the power of words.

Many times our visiting friends and neighbours ignorantly throw abusive and derogatory words at our kids and parents just sit there and watch especially in this part of the world. This isn't too good in my opinion.

Just yesterday, a close friend of our family visited. Jokingly but ignorantly, he tagged our first child "stubborn" but my wife quickly responded that the thirdler is not stubborn, he's just living out his age. She went ahead to reassure the young chap that he was not stubborn but gentle and intelligent.

If our communities must become a better place, we must change our attitude in this regard. If our children must become the leaders of tomorrow, we must change our attitudes in this regard.

We must not be shy or reluctant to correct our close relations and cancel derogatory words with positive ones each time they cross the line.

As much as we can, we must enrol our kids in good schools where we are sure only positive words will be spoken to them.

These kids are tender in age and in heart. They must not be fed with jargon or shattered emotionally with unhealthy words.

Positive words must be employed in encouraging and bringing out the best in them.

Who ever knew that a world renowned neurosurgeon would emerge in Ben Carson?

Who ever knew he could one day aspire to be president of the United States?

The positive words of a good mother made those great potentials see the light of the day.

#parenting #children #womenofsteemit #nigeria

This is indeed the icing on the cake. Thanks a lot sir, I appreciate your awesome contribution.

Your post reminds me of how many parents remember eph 6:1-2 and forget the verse after

We really need the help of God.

Beautifully written. This is reality on ground. Knowledge is power. Thus, those who know the power of word are careful.

On point sir, thanks for your insightful contribution.