I no expect

in #poem2 years ago

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I don't expect you to understand that things are difficult.
That the air becomes heavier and heavier, that breathing becomes more complicated every day.
It weakens my heart, listening to it beat is like screaming under water.
My shoulders are full of tiredness, a heavy burden is on me.

I do not expect you to put yourself in my place, nor to take my tiredness.
I do not seek to take you by the hand and walk with me along this path of thorns.
I want my days to be like this, on the condition that your path is one of golden streets.
A cross ready to carry, with the happiness of guaranteeing you paradise.

I do not expect you to believe in me when I tell you that I care about your arrival.
Your peace is mine, the days are complicated, the darkness takes hold of them.
I want to be the light that dissipates that darkness, but I think it is not winning.
I fight with all my strength, but I think it is not enough.

I am on the edge of the abyss, I look down and see only darkness.
Now I don't know if I've already thrown myself and I'm falling without knowing it.
I'm still there, standing on the precipice, thinking of throwing myself.
When I think I can no longer fall, I find myself on the edge of another precipice.
I don't intend to take you with me, I just want you to climb the ladder that will take you to paradise.

image I - image II - image III

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This is beautiful and very solid. The depth of the subjects touched upon can be felt, and it is evident that you know, from experience, what it is you are talking about.

The first stanza nicely sets the mood for the poem and gives a glimpse into what the poem will be about; that heavy burden. As we go into the second stanza, your concern for the other person not to get caught up in the adversities you are facing is stunning. It takes a lot to take on sever pain for another to feel like they are in 'paradise'.

The third and last stanzas flow nicley together, creating a vivid image of a wounded soul that is struggling and fighting without any results, yet a soul that acknowledges its position and is wary of inflicting pain on another.

The immense care and love are two primal emotions which outshine the reoccuring theme of hopelesness in the poem. You truly did a great job and put together a fine piece of art.

Thanks for sharing!

If you have some time, I invite you to have a look at my blog as I am back on Steem now after being away for a while and have a lot in store for the upcoming weeks!

Once again, thank you!

Lukasz.

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