RE: Psychology Addict # 39 | Need For Approval & External Validation
First, I have to say that this article was such an easy read. It helps to understand the subject of discussion without having to wade through a pool of professional terms. I think this need to belong is the mother of peer pressure, which appears to have a stronger hold on the young, who'd do anything to "belong" to the "cool kids," especially at a school. It doesn't stop as a young person, some societies only value materialistic things and tend to value the self-worth of an individual by the number of zeros in their bank account balance and, oftentimes, the number of personal belongings such as cars, houses, etc. People have been driven to a life of crime in their bid to acquire wealth and hence gain "respect" and belong to meet up with such a materialistic society. I was reading the inspiring story of Ben Carson, one of the world's most gifted former pediatric neurosurgeon, The Gifted Hands, I saw his rebellion and the push to make his struggling mother spend the little money she earned from doing menial jobs on a "cool dress" in other to join other cool kids in high school. Even though he was a top performing student, he still felt the need to belong and be accepted by some of the cool, obviously less intelligent people, in his school.
I guess we only break free from such negative effects of belonging to the detriment of our wallet, health, etc by knowing that those people whom we struggle to show off that "we've finally made it or arrived," most of the time do not really care as much as we may think. On the internet almost everyone is rich, the Instagram is filled with "millionaires" who spend time showing selfies in various exotic destinations. Most of which may not really be doing as great as their twitter/Instagram pictures say they do. They get seriously offended if someone is to say something negative about the situation. People like me know that people do not care as much as that. If it's my grandmother, she says if you really want to know if people care about you disappear for some days and see who asked after you. She said the chances are the people who may ask of your whereabouts are probably those you are owing! That was a hilarious statement of hers, but she may be right. I always look forward to your weekend posts. Thank you for sharing.