4:22 AM and Panicked
It was 4:22 am this morning and I was scrolling through my instagram feed. For what seemed like forever, I thought about my life overall, my career, my love life and even what I wanted for breakfast. I couldn't help but be in a panic mode about my future and where I was heading. Was I going in the right direction? Am I happy? What needs to change? How quickly can I change it? Priding myself on being a great manifester, why haven't certain things manifested? Were my desires not the best choices for me? For hours, I was experiencing a constant internal battle.
When I am tired, I ALWAYS think the worst and don't always think clearly. Stuff comes up that I probably wouldn't stress about otherwise. But this has been happening to me alot lately, way more than usual. In the past, when this does happen, I place more emphasis on my practice and when I do that, things get back to a normal, relaxed flow. However, to be honest, I have focused more than ever on my practice recently. I frequently meditate. I run on the treadmill. I go to yoga. I state affirmations. And as recently mentioned, I started even practicing breathwork. Every day I try to take at least one step towards my goals. WHY IS THIS ANXIETY HAPPENING? AND WHY NOW?
I currently heard that how you spend your first hour in the morning impacts your day dramatically. On just a few hours of sleep this morning, ready to start the day, I decided to prepare myself for a great day with a positive guided meditation.
This meditation was a little bit different than my normal meditations. Instead of hearing positive affirmations like I normally do, the speaker asked a series of questions about what the listener was grateful for. As I answered each question in my mind, I started to feel an emotional shift. When the meditation was over, I realized something major. How can we enjoy our days and expect more in our lives, if we are not grateful for what we currently have? And I mean, really grateful. Now, of course I am grateful and I constantly say it all the time. I have it alot easier than most people do in life, living in a happy home with food on the table. I know that and I am grateful for it. But today, I didn't just say it. I thought about it. I felt the feelings of gratefulness in my heart as I listed in my mind each person, place, thing and experience I was grateful for in life. I spent a full 20 minutes just thinking about all that was good in my life and how things were accomplished when I wasn't always sure things would come into fruition.
That being said, I decided to adopt a gratitude list in my practice. I realize that no matter what I do in my life, I must be grateful and really feel it. I think focusing at least a few minutes a day on gratitude, I can be grateful for everything that I have accomplished and I can be excited for what is it to come. I have witnessed storms and rainbows in life and both, I have handled accordingly.
I also told myself once again, I am human. These things are going to happen and when they do, I need to feel what I need to feel and move on. I've learned that life can come with ups and downs, but how you handle it, is really the key.
What do you guys do to manage stress and anxiety?
Hope my story helps!
Second Image taken from Pexels.com.